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  #1  
Oud 6 januari 2011, 15:50
siri21 siri21 is offline
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Geregistreerd: 6 januari 2011
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Standaard Feedback gevraagd (Engelse motivatiebrief voor toelating master)

He allemaal,

Over een tijd ga ik me aanmelden op Maastricht University. Ik wil de master of International Business in Strategic Marketing gaan volgen. Daarvoor is een motivatiebief nodig. Ik ben al een hele tijd bezig om een juiste brief te schrijven en heb al van verschillende mensen feedback ontvangen. Nu wil ik graag een aantal objectieve meningen ontvangen van jullie! Wilt degene die zich geroepen voelt eens mijn (onderstaande) brief bekijken en je commentaar/feedback geven? :-) Alvast super bedankt!!



January 6th, 2010

Subject: Letter of motivation

Dear members of the admissions committee,

With this letter I want to convince you of my motivation for the admission to the Master of Science in International Business with a specialization in Strategic Marketing for the 2011 September intake.

I recently graduated from Business School Notenboom and obtained my Bachelor of Business Administration. During this study, I realized that I am very eager to learn and want to keep on studying to amplify analytical skills and my personal development. With the experience of my previous study and various internships I noticed my elation to design, manage and monitor marketing strategies that bring more value to customer relationships, and my elation to analyze and write. Now I am looking for a programme where I can find this, but has a focus on what counts today and has a deep integration between theory and real life practice. I found that in this programme. Also, this programme really suits my personal interests. I am not afraid to try new approaches and I have strong interpersonal skills because I take initiative, convince people and show sympathy, but adapt myself quickly if necessary. My desire of succeeding in the world of marketing is very big and I want to know how marketing can be utilized to create the most value. Given my sound basic knowledge of marketing – I have 26,5 ECTS with a 8,4 GPA on Marketing – and my everlasting interest in learning about marketing, will make this master a worthwhile investment in my future.

Further I realized, with my proficiency of writing a few different kinds of essays during my three internships and my experience during working several part-time jobs, my genuine inquisitiveness about marketing and building relationships with customers, both in the psychological as the statistical way. After visiting the university, surfing at the website of the university, talking with members of the faculty and reading the brochure, it was clear to me that this programme connects one of mine most important goals: to succeed as a marketer and create more value to customer relationship.

The joy and my enthusiasm of analyzing combined with eagerness to learn about the different components of marketing and how to create customer loyalty, results in a motivated student who is excited to understand the aspects of marketing. This master’s programme at Maastricht University will offer me great courses to broaden my knowledge in order to get towards my destination of becoming successful in the world of marketing. During my traineeship at the Marketing- and Sales department of Eden Designhotel and Brasserie FLO Maastricht, I learned that establishing, maintaining and enhancing relationships is very important. Therefore, the Relationship Management course will teach me how to develop this skill even more. The Return on Marketing course is also enthralling, because I want to know the impact of marketing and what marketing exactly does. Combined with recent marketing challenges, this course will guarantee much needed and, for me personally, wanted knowledge. Besides these fascinating courses, the course Research for Marketing Decision Making is a great mix of my interests: analyzing, improving marketing decision making and interpret findings. Assemble all this knowledge with the Value-Based Marketing course, were the real-life project is eye-opening, and the Marketing Innovation Management course, where we will learn everything about interaction of marketing and how to strategically manage innovations, this results in a cognition that will create me in an ideal partner in strategic marketing.

An addition to my interest in this programme is the master’s exchange. I would like to take the opportunity to gain experience abroad for gaining a positive influence for both my career and personal horizons. The opportunity to meet and work with people from all over the world is a great aspect of the programme. We can learn much from each other; not only in the year at the university, but also afterwards during my career and further throughout life.

As a conclusion I would like to say that I am eager to gain new experiences and this programme is the best way to achieve all of my objectives. My ambitions would fit well within your university. The international aspect and high standard of education encounters different students from various countries, making the interaction during the study very enriching and exactly what I am looking for. I believe that the Master of Science in International Business would offer me the possibility of receiving an education which is very useful in the near future. I am positive about the fact that Maastricht University would be an excellent continuation for my ambitious business career.

I appreciate your time and effort and would like to thank you for considering my application.

With kind regards,
Siri Lejeune

Enclosure:
- Application form.
- Curriculum Vitae.
- List of grades.
- Great Point Average (GPA).
- A photocopy of my Bachelor of Business Administration.
- A photocopy of my valid EU ID-card.
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  #2  
Oud 6 januari 2011, 22:35
Hassan
Gast
 
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1: Je brief is veel te lang.
2: Je Engels is slecht: veel te direct van NL naar EN vertaald met het woordenboek: de verkeerde woorden in de context. Ook veel stijlfouten.
Succes!
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  #3  
Oud 5 februari 2011, 14:17
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Gast
 
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Verder kun je geen 8,4 als gpa hebben; je hebt waarschijnlijk een 4,0, en als 'gemiddelde cijfer' een 8,4.
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